Where Pippin Lives
Posted on Tue Oct 22nd, 2019 @ 4:33am by Lieutenant Elara Evander & Lieutenant Commander Jacob "Jack" Devine
Mission:
Down the Rabbit Hole
Location: Elara Evander's Quarters
Timeline: MD: 07 - 1801
Jacob stood outside Elara’s quarters. This time he had shoes on, his shirt was properly buttoned, and he wasn’t late. He thought about her most of the day particularly when his mind wasn’t occupied with keeping his wing alive during flight simulation. To that end he was sore and trying not to hold himself in a way that would suggest he needed any special attention. Zoomie had already laid it on pretty thick. Drawing in a careful breath he reached up and rang the chime.
Bouncing on the balls of her bare feet, Elara really kept herself from opening the door before Jacob rang the chime and then counting to thirty in her head before finally responding to it. She was probably far too excited, but it was better she supposed than being nervous about it being her turn to host dinner night. She'd changed into a dark orchid v-neck caftan mini dress, the sleeves on it were sheer and the overall sheer covered longer than the underdress. It really wasn't something she'd really wear out that she could think of, but she thought it was perfectly acceptable for a quiet dinner in. Her hair was down, her curls probably a mess from all over her up and down and everywhere while prepping things. "Perfect timing," she told him, her voice likely betraying her level of excitement.
Her quarters were mostly dark, illumination she normally kept around twenty-five percent and didn't think it any different. She held out her hand for Jacob, behind her she had set up a picnic on the floor complete with blanket and a couple of candles.
The stress of the day was forgotten with one look at Elara. Jacob smiled as he gave her his hand and allowed himself to be pulled far enough inside for the doors to close behind them. His eyes took a moment to adjust to the dimmer lighting and then he saw what she had laid out on the floor. A picnic. The whole ambiance was romantic and peaceful. "Add a few pillows and you'll be lucky to keep me awake," he teased, pulling her into his body by their joined hands and stealing a kiss. Looking down into her eyes he added, "You look lovely and hey, I remembered shoes." His smiling eyes shifted from hers to his feet.
"Well you don't need them now if you don't want them," Elara told him looking to his feet and then back to him as they moved toward the picnic. It wasn't fancy, she'd gone with simple things. The blanket on the floor was a red and white woven plaid. There were several dishes all in a matte black color. The long rectangular dish contained an array of fresh fruit: strawberries, raspberries, red pear slices, peace slices, pineapple chunks, green grapes, and yellow-red cherries. Smaller plates contained crackers, a soft cheese, and sliced cheeses. Two plates with a small basic salad and a small rustic pizza. There were also glasses and a bottle of wine on ice set to the side of the blanket. "It's not fancy," she told him. "I wanted it to be fancy...like a really fancy blanket and floor pillows...twinkle-y lights," she said as she motioned with her hand arcing up over in a half circle over top where the picnic was placed. "And like a tent but made with really beautiful fabrics." She paused for a moment. "But this was the best I could do."
"Next thing you know, you'll be telling me I didn't have to button my shirt either." Jacob couldn't resist the remark considering how unprepared he'd been for her arrival two nights ago. He listened to her commentary about what she'd wanted. "So you're telling me you want the grown up version of the fort we built back when I was like... five?" He almost laughed thinking about it. They'd borrowed a large piece of fabric from Jacob's mom that she had set aside for something special. Of course Jacob didn't think to ask. With the lamp light beneath the sequins it sparkled like stars and they had pretended they were camping out beneath them. "Really, El, it all looks wonderful and it's plenty fancy for me." Of course the hard part was going to be getting down there without wincing.
The first thing Jacob did was slip off his shoes. He didn't want to get the blanket dirty. His socks were an exact match to his shirt, WW2 bombers on basic black. "My first mentor and adopted father figure, Freely, was sort of nuts about world war two fighters. I much prefer more modern tech but there's something to be said about simpler times." He got down on his knees first then sort of settled a bit to the side, wincing with the movement in spite of his best effort.
"I think it's quite fun," Elara told him. Her tone turned flirty and her fingers ran along his shoulder as she remained standing. "And...maybe I wouldn't have cared if your shirt was buttoned either." She was beaming at him, but then it dropped into a state of concern. "I think I'm forgetting something," she told him. Sure, it wasn't perfect, but she wanted it to be as close as possible. "Do you want something else to drink besides wine?" she asked, maybe that was it.
"Now you tell me," Jacob returned as he tipped his head to one side in response to the touch of her hand, his cheek gently pressing her fingers against his shoulder. Of course he'd never show up like that and right now it was probably a good idea if his shirt stayed buttoned. "The wine is just fine, El." The wine would help relax his stiff body, mask the pain so he wasn't so stiff. "I think you just need to join me." He smiled up at her then awkwardly patted the blanket beside him.
She waited a moment, slightly hesitant, before finally settling down next to Jacob with her feet tucked under her. "Also, is there anything bad about me wanting our space fort in my living area?" she asked. "Eating in a fort is so much better than eating at an actual table like normal people." Elara smiled at him before stealing a raspberry off the plate and popping it into her mouth. She wanted everything to be perfect because she could really get used to dinners with Jacob all the time.
"I suppose you want to revert to childhood sizes as well?" Jacob didn't mind her exuberance but he couldn't imagine hanging out in a space fort at his current size. Granted he didn't reach his father's six feet but he came rather close... His thoughts trailed off with one look in her eyes. He didn't think he'd ever made one person even a fraction of the happy Elara was in that moment. "You really missed me, didn't you?"
There was a wonder if he thought she was silly for missing that time in her life and in turn missing him like she had. "I did," she whispered. Elara was really quiet for a long pause before looking down as she scooted closer to him. "But now you're here...so that's what really matters, right?" There was no expectation for him to miss her the same, that had been pounded into her head for a while now...and maybe she really was silly for this want to recreating their fort. It wasn't exactly the space fort she'd had in mind, it had been the happiness and safety and comfort she'd felt inside of it. She looked back up at him, "and it's dinner…you can start, not like I stand on any kind of ceremony about meals." Well, not when out of uniform and it not being some kind of official social gathering.
Jacob shifted his weight carefully to wrap an arm around Elara. "I missed you too, El. The difference is that I didn't realize how much until now." He'd been so used to being emotionally solitary and he wasn't sure what it was except for that past connection that made it so easy for Elara's presence to slide under his shields. He smiled at her and reached for a strawberry as it was the closest thing and offered it to her. "How was your day today?" His was getting better by the minute.
"I'm not liked right now," she told him smiling. She took a bite of the offered strawberry. The fruit was definitely a good choice she thought. It was refreshing after the long day. "But I got some things done," she added after a moment. "How was yours?"
"About the same. Being liked doesn't come with the job description it seems." He popped the rest of the strawberry in his own mouth. He'd changed up flights, remixing his pilots according to dynamics and while most didn't question his authority to do so there was still some muttering involved. Jacob was accustomed to it on both sides of the chain of command though and he didn't let it bother him. "I let Zoomie fly our bird in simulation." He shook his head. "Worst mistake ever." Withdrawing his arm from Elara's shoulders, Jacob leaned forward to snag the plate the pizza was on and draw it closer, wincing as the motion reminded him just how sore he was. "Can't believe you still remember what I like on pizza."
"You okay?" she asked as she watched him, slight concern slipping onto her face. Elara reached out and grabbed the wine before setting it next to her. She grabbed the glasses and then went to work on opening the wine bottle.
"Yeh, just a little sore from training exercises," Jacob replied as he picked up a slice of the pizza. "Nothing serious." And nothing he hadn't experienced before though granted he probably wouldn't have experienced it had he not let Zoomie take a hand at the controls. The simulators were dialed down intentionally on safety, not enough so pilots would be seriously injured but enough so that their mistakes made a lasting impression. Jacob found that cause and effect was just about the best engine for motor memory and as a fighter pilot you relied a lot on instinct and experience in the crush. He took a bite of the pizza. “This is sooooo good,” he managed with his mouth half full.
"I'm glad you like it," Elara told him brightly. She honestly hadn't been sure if the food choices would go over well or not. There hadn't been enough time back together for her to really properly gage. Pouring the wine, she set one glass next to Jacob and then put the other one in front of her (where she hoped not to knock it over). Quietly Elara sat there eating a couple of bites of salad before speaking up again. "Tell me about something I missed with you?" she requested quietly.
"Good stuff? Bad stuff? What exactly do you want to hear?" Jacob had finished one slice of pizza and picked up his glass of wine. "I've been in the middle of two minor wars and a skirmish, made friends, lost a few, worked for spec ops, was a prisoner, had my TSO fall for me.... you know there was this one time when my flight leader paired me with another Betazoid thinking we'd be like some killer duo but I couldn't just let him in and he got a little pissed about it, didn't like failing Hack and..." Jacob ducked his head. "Worst idea ever. Biggest physical fight I've ever had." He shook his head. "They had to reassign us both."
"I want to hear all of the stuff," she said quietly. Elara knew that in reality that they couldn't make up for all the time they'd been apart or even all the time they hadn't talked...she wanted to try to know what she'd missed just the same even if she got it in pieces here and there. She'd latched onto this thought long ago that she'd been silly for being so attached to Jacob (and to the memories in her head) but at the same time...there was this conflicting feeling in her. Since she'd been back with Jacob just days before...there was something undeniable for how she felt for him...how she felt around him...and just how happy she was. That wasn't an illusion, it still felt like everything she'd been struggling to grip to for so long with just Pippin as a reminder of it all. To hear all the things that Jacob listed made her want to hear about them all, but made her concerned for what she had missed. There had already been things discussed between them that she'd wished that she'd been there with him for. She figured that there would be plenty of other instances where she'd feel the same. "They obviously don't realize that while Betazoids tend to value an openness and transparency, that not everyone is the same…"
"Hack also didn't account for our hybrid status. I am half human after all and Sona... well, he was mixed as well but I was never told with what." Jacob lowered his wine glass. "Maybe it was Klingon, he almost broke my nose." He shrugged. "We were definitely not the same much to Hack's disappointment." Sitting this close to Elara, Jacob could feel her presence in a way that reminded him he was half Betazoid. He didn't generally feel this with people because he was always too wound up in keeping to himself and he'd done the job so well that most of the time he found himself feeling more human than anything. This feeling of actually letting that side out to stretch was freeing and oddly addictive. "I suppose maybe I should start at the beginning? And we'll go story by story. I tell one, then it's your turn." He smiled at her. "I want to hear about you as well."
Jacob drew a breath. "Let's see, when your family left 211, I was seven years old. I kept wanting to hang out at your place but they told me I couldn't do that after the first couple of times. A new family was moving in or something. But it was the only place I felt close to you. I used to lay on the floor in your bedroom and talk to you like a crazy person." Jacob smiled at the memory. What a nutty kid he'd been. "So mom decided she was going to forcibly pair me up with new friends. The first was Arthur Prescott. He was a partial Beta like us. Gentlest, kindest soul... He cried easy but oddly never for himself. He'd just get too wound up in other people's hurt. Made him a target for some of the other boys so I ended up falling into the role of 'protector'. And as strange as it's going to sound my second friend was gained by defending Arthur. Big, dark skinned fully human boy. Tackled him for teasing Arthur even though he was almost twice my size." Jacob ducked his head. He'd gotten his first ever bloody nose that day but oddly neither of his parents were angry with him in spite of what the school teacher had said. Apparently defending others was a desirable trait in their son.
"Of course Orion didn't become our friend that day. That actually happened when Michik's gang tried to kill him after school. Arthur didn't even try to stop me. He went for help while I jumped in to try to even the odds a bit. Orion told me later that I was a fool. Said, 'who the hell defends the person who beat them senseless?'" Jacob shrugged, eyes on the contents of his wineglass. "I just can't stand when things are unfair, El. And he didn't really beat me senseless but that's how Oreo ended up part of the three musketeers." He looked up. "Myvelle and Dallas and Jenn came later... I mean, they were there at the same time but you know.... the whole 'ewww girls' phase." Not that it had lasted long. Jacob leaned in over the top of his glass and dropped a kiss on Elara's lips. As he pulled back he said, "Your turn."
She blushed a bit and hooked a curl behind her ear as she looked down for a moment, processing the story he'd just told her. He sounded like for the most part he'd faired fairly well after she'd left Starbase 211 and that was conflicting to hear, she was glad but it was hard too. It wasn't like she had wanted him to mope and he'd seemed happy most times when they'd talked she remembered (or maybe that's how her memory colored it), but those had always been her happy times even when things had been harder. "I didn't want to be on the Mazerine and I made it abundantly clear," Elara told him as she looked back up at him. "I'm pretty sure Leo was happy to go socialize with his weird friends… I had Pippin," she said with a shrug. "And I had this hope that we wouldn't be separated for long." It was a bit embarrassing to admit to him, she supposed, but it was the truth. "I went to school, went through the motions, but I never really had this group of friends. They were just other kids my age to work on projects."
Elara went quiet and looked down again, picking up her wine glass. The past was something that she tried not to dwell too much on, she knew that she could get swallowed up and lost there in all the regret and grief that was contained in all those memories. She sipped her wine before finally continuing, trying not to let her tone reflect her own emotions. "When things started to change...I just didn't feel like anyone understood me, but then I guess that it's probably more difficult when puberty hits and you're going through more changes than other kids. The headaches and the feelings that were mine and that weren't didn't make it easier and just made me want to stay in my room alone," she told him. "Leo went away to the Academy and as much as he annoys and was so mean to me, I missed him and it made it all the harder. I couldn't figure out the shield thing and I think that probably made things harder…my parents definitely had a hard time with it. I was definitely the trouble child."
"I'm sorry," Jacob said softly, one hand reaching out to touch hers. "I doubt you were as much trouble as you felt like. What I could never get was balance. You had trouble pushing people out but once I got the shield bit I had trouble letting people in. It scared me too much. I marvel that you can exist in such a state of chaos. I'd go mad." He looked down at their hands. "When mom got sick, I had to keep the world out for two people. She'd complain that I made her lonely but when I tried to let go she'd scream out in pain. What I didn't know was that she'd been on inhibitors so long that she grew tolerant and they stopped working. There at the end..." his voice caught and the words trailed off. He'd never told anyone about it, not even his father. Truthfully he didn't want to think about it. Even after all this time it was still too hard to embrace.
Clearing his throat, Jacob picked up his wineglass and took a sip. "I spent a year in seclusion after she passed. It was months before I'd let anyone in that wasn't dad. We were two people suffering side by side and yet entirely alone. It was Arthur that pushed his way back into my life and eventually dragged me back into living. I was just getting the hang of socializing when the Luminai blew our world apart and separated us all again for the last time. Well, all of us but Arthur. He managed to stay with me longer than the rest but everything had changed so much. Our childhood blew up with the station." He looked at Elara. "But you know what that loss is like."
"You felt it differently," Elara told him gently. She squeezed his hand before leaning in to press a kiss to his temple. "I'm glad that you had Arthur...maybe one day I'll get to meet him." She was quiet, he'd proposed a story for a story and the next chapter was just as hard as his had been. Their parents had died all around the same time...and that was really when they'd lost touch altogether. It wasn't just the pain and loss of that time period but the overload of regret she had for several reasons that she'd yet to let go of. She was quiet for a few minutes, sipping her wine and mentally preparing herself. Elara could glaze over all of this with counselors, putting on a happy persona was something that she'd learned years ago...she was super done with crying and breaking down in counseling offices (if she could help it). "They were trying to get civilians off the Mazerine when the war heated up, but they didn't have anyone they felt like they could send me to on Earth," Elara said matter of factly. "Leo was on his cadet cruise." She shrugged. "Grandpa didn't want me then...and he didn't want me after either."
Quiet she looked to Jacob. "I knew that Dad was gone when they blew up the stardrive after we separated, but I didn't know about Mom until much later," Elara told him quietly, "though I swear I heard her when they were moving us through the ship. I thought she had been right behind us. That she'd been called away once we'd been secured...but it doesn't make sense." The stardrive had been destroyed which had been where her father had been, but her mother had been in one of the science labs on the saucer which had been severely damaged shortly after the stardrive's destruction and many in those sections had died.
She was quiet again and looked away. Her head was swirling with emotions that she was trying to push aside (or somewhere that wasn't the forefront). She tried to brighten her tone. "I got sent to the Academy I think by default, I have no idea what would have happened if I had been too young. I sort of had to make friends there...everyone else was gone. Grandpa didn't want me. Leo was busy." She took a breath before she couldn't push out the next part. "And they kept telling me to leave you alone…" Elara had been told many things besides that, but that was the simplified version of it all.
"In some ways we were navigating the same set of waters. You might as well have had no family at all, like me." Jacob met her eyes. "But they were wrong to tell you to leave me alone. We could have helped each other. There were so many men in my life back then, EL." He rolled his eyes as he added, "I was drowning in men. I don't know why it bothered me so much. There was Erin but she was in the chain of command and always super busy and Jessica, the counselor who tried to get me to unload, but she left. Sprocket and Shorty were placed elsewhere. Hannah left and broke Ky’s heart.” He paused briefly. “I honestly think I didn't even begin to process mom's death until dad died and then," he drew a breath in and let it out slow, "there just wasn't time, space, anyone to help me figure it out. I was so angry with life. They all said that was good. Anger meant I wasn't giving up. Anger could become the fuel for ambition, moving mountains. They just didn't understand how tired I was carrying that anger. I did so many stupid things. I was almost expelled from the Academy twice." Jacob took another sip of his wine. "The first time wasn't my fault and they realized their mistake. The second time I was insanely guilty but because of their first error they let me slide. I shouldn't be here, but I am."
"The thing with emotion, no matter what it is...you can also let it consume you.." Elara told him. "Not in the way that I think most people would think, not in the human way…" She didn't know if she was making sense. "You can let anger fill you and fuel you and consume you in that way, but as an empath you can also drown in it...let it swallow you in a different way." He probably already knew this. "I think that's what my parents worried about...that it was a losing battle for me especially after Leo went away." She reached out and wrapped an arm around him before leaning into him. "I'm glad you are here...against everything…"
"Drowning sounds about right." Jacob tipped his head in her direction as she leaned into him. "Though to be fair, I'm not sure anyone could have helped at that point. I kept trying to run away, get above it all. I almost think they moved forward with putting me in the cockpit just to keep me from trying to hijack another bird." He laughed softly. He'd tried a number of times to take off with a fighter both on the Achilles and in the Academy and was only ever successful that first time. "I'm glad I'm here too, with you." He paused then asked, "So what friends did you make in the Academy?" She'd mentioned having to make her own and he wondered how that went.
"Most of them were science as well, you know...better to know the people who you're going to be partnered up with and against...better for grades," Elara told him and smiled. Her head against him still. "Dan'rol, Holly, Yarel, and Max were the ones in science that I ended up with in most of my classes. They'd all pretty much lost everything, so there was never judgement when any of us had a bad day, but my friendships at the Academy always felt like we were clinging to each other to keep going. There were a lot of smiles and laughter, but inside...it wasn't the same for most there. It was the Academy and I got through it, I don't know where any of them ended up… I told you, I ran into my ex from senior year and cadet cruise, Markus and his now husband. That's really the only person I've seen or talked to since he and I broke up." Elara was quiet and wondered if she just sounded silly. "I don't think I really felt like my mom was really gone until halfway through my sophomore year there...I was still convinced that she was in a coma on a ship or starbase out there and that they had so much other things going on that they just hadn't run her through the database. I just didn't want to be there in the first place, I wasn't ready for the Academy...but at the same time I had to make it work because I didn't really have any other place to go. If I have kids, I think that I'm going to find them about twenty godparents spread all over in case there was something like what happened with my family. That way, I'd never have to worry that they would be alone if something were to happen to me."
Spread out being the key. If Elara's parents were like Jacob's then they had plenty of friends on their ship just not so much elsewhere. Naturally when the ship was hit... "I think I found more stubborn people for my friends than you did and we all had similar losses. Sprocket reamed me bad four years ago when we had our reunion at the newly rebuilt Starbase 211. I had dropped out of their lives for too long and missed Alice and Shorty's wedding." There wasn't much he could do about it stuck in a prison camp. "And I was on Oreo's ship for the ride to meet Andromeda. He made me stay with him and kept me up several nights running regaling me with tales of his Academy days and everything he did to climb the ranks to CSO. And Tagalong's out there now...left the Academy for his cadet cruise and is probably on his first real ship sitting helm. If I don't answer letters, Sprocket has threatened to send an emergency call through the ship's captain." He winced at that thought. "So I do my best to keep up with at least one of them." Jacob turned his head to smile down at her. "If, not when?"
"Sounds like there's a whole tree to relay information with your group," she commented. That was good, though. Better to have a network and be able to find information from one person from a network if you absolutely needed it rather than going through ten people. "Yeah, maybe don't push it...I'm not sure how well our captain would receive being paged through in order for your Sprocket to get ahold of you."
He laughed at that. "Her name is Dallas. Oreo is Orion. Alice is Arthur. Shorty is Myvelle. Tagalong is Evan." Jacob ducked his head. "What can I say? I went through a very bad phase of nicknaming everyone. That was about the time I realized I really did want to be just like dad." Well, maybe not in everything. Jacob loved his father but the man was a runner. Truth be told, Jacob had inherited some of that himself. But it really helped to have people in his life who held on tight and forced him to be accountable. Dallas was good about that. She was truly the elder sister he never had even if she was actually younger than Jacob.
She smiled and shook her head. "I'm sure that they loved their nicknames," Elara told him as she sat up straight, pulling away from him but looking at him. "Did Arthur ever get to like being called Alice? I feel like you might have gotten him teased." After how Jacob had talked about his friend, she doubted that there was any bad blood over the nickname, but still unusual...though children did have their own kind of world. It didn't always matter as much. It was simpler. Sometimes she really missed simple. "And here I am just El."
Jacob grinned. "I called him Alice because he was the most mothering person in my life and it just kinda fit." He paused and looked at Elara sideways. "What makes you think you're just El?" Sure he'd called her that upon reuniting with her but it wasn't what he'd called her back then, not in his head.
She looked at him oddly. "Because that's what you call me or Elara," she told him matter of factly. "What else would you call me?" Elara wondered if she'd missed something.
"Sassy of Erebor," Jacob replied, ducking his head. "You were always Sassy in my mind. I think that started the year before you left. I used to listen to you tell Leo off and just... god, I loved watching you in action." He bit his lip, shrugging. "So you see, you got yours first. I just wasn't brave enough to call you that to your face and I added Erebor in when you took my Smaug and named him Pippin."
Elara smacked his arm lightly. "Jake, I don't know why you would think I'm sassy," she told him but couldn't keep the smile off her face. She and Leo definitely got into it alot, their age difference was enough that Leo pretty much always thought she was annoying. She didn't know anyone else who had tried to get rid of a sister like Leo had. "And here you are just being Jacob...Jake...and whatever else people call you now that you're all grown up."
"I can still see your younger self with hands on hips and that leading stomp of the foot as you told Leo off real good. Sassy you were and I loved you all the more for it." Jacob admitted. He picked up his glass of wine with his free hand. "As for me I was born Jacob, raised Jake, and grew up to be Jack. What can I say, people around me just don't have my imagination." He paused. "Except maybe Freely. He wanted to call me Bandit, but Hijack stuck."
Crinkling up her nose she shook her head and then wrapped her arms around his shoulders before leaning in and kissing him. "You'll be Jake to me...always," Elara told him. To her, she didn't see him as a Jack, but then she'd known him as Jacob and Jake for so long...her brain didn't want to flip it to something else. "Unless I think of something more fitting," she added a moment later a bit mischievously and squeezed him a bit.
The kiss was too short. As Elara pulled away, Jacob attempted to lean in a little more but then she was off and talking and he found himself watching her mouth. The end result was a little jet lag in his brain catching up to what his ears were hearing. "Something else?" he said stupidly then felt his whole face go warm. Okay, that was new. "I would definitely be interested in um in what your imagination comes up with. Until that day, Jake is fine." He took a drink from his glass, glad for the excuse to look away from her for a few seconds.
As much as there was this very real connection that felt like they'd never been separated, there was still very much this learning...and grown up Jacob's reactions was still something she was learning. She also had really never felt like she was too good with people. When she was younger, her mother said that being able to master her Betazoid side would help her...that it would make things clearer. That had never happened. Elara released him completely and snagged a piece of cheese, figuring that there should be some eating of the food. She went really quiet for a couple of minutes, thinking and not knowing how to feel about anything really. Having conflicting feelings wasn't something new to her. "Do you want to hear about my project that has my department all up in arms?" Elara asked. There were other things to fill each other in about, but she felt like she'd hit an emotional wall. Taking in the past she'd missed with Jacob but then also thinking about her own… The ghosts still haunted her and she wouldn't be surprised if they clung to him as well. There were be more nights for stories though. It didn't need to all be rehashed in one night.
It hurt and Jacob wasn't sure why. There was just something about Elara's retreat that made him feel like he'd misstepped. He watched her fill her plate with cheese in silence. When she asked about her project he said, "Tell me," and yet his heart wasn't in it. What he really wanted to know was what was going on in her head, why she'd pulled away simply because he'd embarrassed himself by allowing his mind to wander. As he waited for her to begin he reached for the fruit and selected a handful of strawberries, still watching her. Maybe there'd be some clue in what she said or maybe by the time she was finished talking he'd 'man up' enough to actually ask her what had just happened. Either way he was quiet, obviously waiting for her to go on as he took a bite out of one of the strawberries he held, barely tasting it.
Eating a piece of cheese, she went to sip her wine before speaking up about her new project. "So I'm going to convert one of the smaller science labs into the closest thing I can get to an arboretum," she said brightly. "Everything I think will be in some kind of container, so it's self contained...don't need to worry if the ship isn't structurally sound in case a large root where to try to burrow in." Elara was excited about it because it would not only possibly benefit the whole ship, but she also thought it would be relaxing. "It won't just be pretty things...but food as well."
He listened to her chatter on about creating an arboretum and tried to be caught up in her excitement but it was like she was pulling away from him and he wasn't quite sure what to do about it. "Sounds like a lot of work ahead of you," Jacob said quietly, swirling the remaining contents of his wineglass as he watched the reddish purple liquid chase itself in circles. "I can help off shift if you need it," he offered. He didn't know much about plants aside from basic survival training but he was willing to learn. "Maybe you can have fresh strawberries," he suggested with a faint smile as he stuck another one from his hand into his mouth.
Her mouth opened in order to respond to him, but she closed it when she noticed the change in him. Elara stared at him for a long moment, her smile fading. "What did I do?" she asked quietly. As much as things were easy between them, they weren't young children anymore. They were different people. She didn't want to screw up. Jacob was far too important to her.
"You let go?" Jacob met her worried expression and realized it was about to get really awkward. "No, really, you didn't do anything wrong, El. It's just me being stupid." He set his glass down and laid back on the floor, his knees drawn up as he regarded the ceiling. Oh yeah, that was better. He'd been holding himself so carefully that he'd gotten stiff. Elbows at his side and hands resting across his stomach, Jacob turned his head to look at her. "I think it's all part of figuring each other out."
Setting her wine glass down, she moved to lay on her stomach alongside him. Elara was really quiet at first, thinking about what he'd said. "I don't want to lose you," she blurted out her thoughts. It wasn't a lie. It was the truth. "I like...whatever this is between us and I'm afraid to mess it up," she tried to explain. Elara didn't know how far to go, but they didn't need to have secrets. "Normally I want my space...but not with you." She was quiet and looked down for a moment before looking back over at him. "And I was afraid I was being too much...but you're right, we're still learning each other. It'll take time."
"You're not going to mess it up. That's a two people job," Jacob said with a smirk. "I promise I'll help if it comes to that." Not that he was suggesting such a thing would be deliberate but the burden certainly didn't lie only with Elara. She had to know that. "And you're never going to be too much, El. Remember, you're talking to the guy who grew up with you for the first seven years of his life. It's just that this guy is no longer that innocent little boy who followed you around like a puppy dog. Your quick little pecks on the lips aren't exactly annoying anymore." He turned his attention back on the ceiling. How did he admit that he'd only been thinking about her lips on his when she pulled away?
She scooted a bit closer so that her hip touched his and turned towards him a bit more. "Things are different now," Elara said quietly as she watched him. "We didn't have our abilities...and we didn't have the feelings we have now...and you were much faster at getting out of shows of affection for the most part when we were younger."
He smiled at that last bit. "It's not a difference I mind. I just didn't get enough kissing last night or this morning." For all their talk they'd done just that and talked more than anything until one or the both of them fell asleep. Jacob looked at Elara, giving her a slightly pouty expression that ended on a sheepish grin and an inward roll of the eyes at his own behavior. "Honestly it's fine. You can kiss me as much as you want. Just don't always expect me to keep up with what you're talking about when you do." He brought one arm up and laid the back of it against his face in mock horror. "Yes, El, I grew into just your typical guy while we were apart and no, the extra insight doesn't help me navigate at all." Actually it did, just not with Elara.
Beaming, she blushed a bit looking away for a moment before deciding that her position laying on the floor wasn't working for her. She moved back into a sitting position but close enough to Jacob so that she could land a kiss, which she did. "So are you saying that if I'm going to babble on about science things you'd prefer it be punctuated with kisses?"
And he'd gone and done it to himself, handing over what power he did have to a woman who was rather pleased with herself in that moment. Jacob reached for Elara, mischievous mynx that she was and pulled her down with the intention of getting a longer kiss. All he succeeded in doing was causing her to lose her balance and impact with his badly bruised chest. He flinched, gasping softly but managed to pull her over the top of him and gently deposit her on her back beside him then half rolled over so he was leaning over her. He kissed her back and it wasn't some sweet little peck on the lips. Maybe he hurt like hell but for Jacob the kiss was worth every stab. When he pulled back to look into Elara's eyes he said, "Only if you don't want me paying attention."
The kiss was something that Elara wanted to get back to, but the concern in her was more in the forefront. She reached up and ran her fingers through his hair, her eyes on his. "You okay?" she asked. Had she hit him in a weird spot or elbowed him or hit a bone wrong? She wasn't the most graceful person, but she'd definitely not meant to hurt him if she'd done so.
"I'm fine, just sore," he said. It was the second time she'd asked and the second time he'd answered the same and so Jacob figured maybe he'd better explain. "We call it harness whipped. Rookie pilot injury but in my defense Zoomie was flying." He leaned on one elbow, his other hand stroking Elara's hair off her forehead and away from her face as he looked down into her eyes. "You can kiss it and make it feel better if you want," he teased, eyes dancing.
"Is this one of those injuries where you're practically bleeding to death and you're claiming it's just a scratch?" she questioned, raising an eyebrow in concern.
"Would you feel better if you saw it for yourself?" Jacob didn't expect her to take him up on it. He was merely being silly, trying to erase that look on her face. Dipping his head he dropped a kiss on her nose.
"Oh you have no choice, Jake," Elara told him quite seriously. "Let's see how minimal this harness whip nonsense is...I'm assuming this means you didn't go to Sickbay to have it actually looked at."
Jacob's eyes widened for a fraction of a second and then he sighed over-dramatically. "No, I didn't see a reason. I'm bruised, not dying." He retreated at that point, however, laying on his back beside her. He smiled up at Elara as they reversed positions so that she was now hanging over him. With his hand on the side away from her he reached up and unbuttoned his top button. "You sure you wanna see?"
"You have absolutely no chance of me kissing it to make it all better if you hide it," she half teased and went to help him with buttons. "Also, I don't think that you're certified on the whole whether you're dying thing or not...unless you got a medical degree while we were apart." She pushed back the black shirt and immediately gasped at the bruising on his left shoulder as that was all that was visible. Elara moved the fabric to get a clearer picture of the bruising on his torso and her concern only skyrocketed. "How did you not go to Sickbay after this?"
Her eyes were kind and it was a little amusing that he was laying on her floor on his back while she partially undressed him. Jacob let his hand fall away and left her to finish with the buttons. Watching her mouth form that little 'o' of surprise when she pushed back the material to really get a good look at his chest was worth the attention. "I've been flying for fourteen years, El. This isn't the first time I've been harnessed whipped. In fact, the first time was at sixteen and I fractured a few ribs in the process. It's happened enough that I know when I'm broke. I'm not broke. Just sore and apparently pretty to look at it." He tipped his head to catch her eyes. "Still want to kiss it better?" he asked with a smile.
She leaned in and pressed a long kiss to his lips before pulling back again. "I'll kiss you all you want after we go to Sickbay and have you properly checked out," Elara told him seriously. "At the very least, they can use the dermal regenerator and give you something for the pain." She ran her fingers gently over his bruised shoulder. "I don't want a broken Jacob."
Jacob’s head lifted as Elara retreated in a failed attempt to keep the kiss going only to fall back with the realization that he wasn't going to tempt her. So he listened to her talk, eyes closed as his mind traced the feel of her fingertips sliding down his skin in a careful fashion that was almost ticklish but felt so good. The first words out of his mouth when she finished talking were, "I'm not broken,” followed by, “and I only hurt when I move wrong."
"Come on," she told him. "We're going to take a trip to Sickbay." Elara didn't care if he'd gotten this same injury before. They weren't at war, it wasn't like there was a real valid excuse not to get checked out or to wave it off. "Right now."
"You're not going to let this go, are you?" Jacob asked, his hands coming up to cup her face, eyes meeting hers. "It will be better in a few days on its own and I'm willing to bet once the doc has a look she'll just leave it up to me anyway."
Elara leaned into his touch, she'd missed this. As much as she wanted to just stay here and melt into Jacob with this level of intimacy, she still was worried about him...even if he didn't seem worried about it at all. "No, I'm not...and you love me, so we're going to go to Sickbay and get you all mended."
"I do love you," Jacob agreed. "But what if we go in the morning? Then I can get my physical at the same time." He smiled at her. "And you can hold me hostage tonight to make sure I go." Elara's eyes were so serious that he knew he would never escape a visit to the medical bay but maybe he could delay it for just a little while longer.
"Do you really think I'll be able to rest or sleep if I'm worrying all night about you? Making sure you're still breathing?" she questioned, she didn't care if he thought she was being dramatic. "I love you, Jacob Devine, and unless you've somehow become ten times more stubborn than you were when we were younger...we're going." She got up so that her knees were tucked underneath her so that she was still staring down at him. Elara just didn't want there to be an issue if they ignored it until morning. Jacob said that it was just bruised, but she was certain that there could be other things that could be wrong...at the very least she didn't like him being in any degree of pain.
How could he not smile in the face of her reasoning? Unless he was more stubborn? Jacob supposed that was all relative to who was asking and Elara knew him far too well. "All right, uncle... aunt even. We'll go." It wasn't serious. He knew it wasn't serious. Elara, however, did not. "I hope after all this fuss you fully intend to give me a reason for not wanting me in any pain." He was teasing, trying to keep it light so she would know that he was oddly okay with being bullied into submission by the look in those beautiful eyes. Jacob rolled to his side carefully and got to his feet then offered her a hand up.
Taking his hand, she was pulled to her feet. Elara wasn't giddy that she'd gotten him to agree to go or anything, but there was some relief in it. She knew that he thought he was fine and maybe that was the truth, but she didn't see the reason to be in pain for days when he could go to Sickbay. Squeezing his hand, she pushed herself up on her toes to kiss him. "This means I have to change and put on shoes…" she told him. Elara hadn't thought that through. Her outfit really wasn't something she felt just walking around the ship in and she didn't think it was late enough that only medical staff would see them.
Another, quick, retreating peck on the lips. He wondered if Elara put much thought into that or was she simply falling into a very old familiar pattern. It annoyed Jacob so much back then because he didn't particularly like being kissed and now... Well, now he wondered just how much feeling was behind her soft lips briefly on his and he found it slightly annoying for a whole different reason. He pushed those thoughts away. She cared for him. He knew that much. Could feel that much. But was it enough? No...not going there.
Jacob captured Elara's waist and pulled her in close to his body. "You look beautiful. Why change?" His dark eyes looked into hers and there was amusement in his expression. "I thought you were in a hurry to drag me to my healing?" He was joking now, enjoying the opportunity to tease her a little in attempts to escape his negative thoughts, knowing full well that he was possibly about to get reamed by the doctor for not taking care of this sooner even if it wasn't a big deal.
"I'll wear this for you or when I'm alone," Elara told him. "But I don't go out like this. The people who have seen this much skin and all my tattoos are basically ninety-seven percent either the person giving me the tattoo or medical staff." She shrugged. "Maybe that's just me being modest, but I'm really not one to want to pull attention to myself when I'm out," she told him honestly. Elara could be the center of attention...while in uniform...and while sciencing or speaking about science. Anything else, she really did try to avoid. She tried to move through ships and stations as invisible as possible and going out how she was was quite the opposite.
Jacob released her waist, raising his hands in surrender on either side of his body. "Guess I better put these buttons back together, then." He could respect Elara's sense of modesty even if he didn't share it on the whole. Granted he never really wore anything revealing but that was more a reason of fashion and uniforms than it was a desire not to show off too much skin. Maybe it was one of the few very 'Betazoid' traits he picked up from his mother that weren't a matter of undeniable biology. He just didn't care if anyone saw him naked.
Elara smiled at his response and leaned in for a quick kiss. "Just maybe...when we come back and the doctor has cleared you...I'll show you another flower to trace," Elara told him. There were at least four of her tattoos that he hadn't seen yet. She disappeared into her bedroom but didn't take long to change, she'd put on comfy dark leggings and a teal sweater. Returning to Jacob, she slipped her hand into his and leaned in for another kiss. "Now, how about getting you checked out?"
By the time Elara returned, Jacob had buttoned his shirt back up which seemed silly to him to some respect because he knew the second he walked into sickbay the doctor would just tell him to take it off again. Still... might as well be as modest as the lady at his side, right? And there went the soft little pecks again. Not one, but two quick kisses. He was actually starting to laugh at himself mentally for counting. She took his hand and he gave her a smile, "If we have to," he replied. "Might as well get it over with."
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LtCmdr Jacob "Jack" Devine
Squadron Ldr - USS Andromeda
Lieutenant Elara Evander
Chief Science Officer, USS Andromeda


